Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Why? This is the first question that comes to mind when I hear the word jealousy, even when it's an emotion I have. The only way I'm going to release this is to talk it out. Here goes: Fear is the root of jealousy. Fear is the root of many emotions. When a woman is jealous of her spouse spending times with others, it's actually revealing a fear that he is going to find them more interesting and leave her. When a man is jealous of how his spouse views other men concerning their looks, it reveals an insecurity in himself that he is not desirable enough for his spouse. The common theme in these scenarios is that jealousy is based on fear of inadequacy, being left, or a poor self image. When one operates in jealousy it seems that the other person should be changing, when in reality I am the one in need of changing. A healthy relationship is one that operates from trust, not needing to be in constant reassurance. Again I come back to the question I began with: why? Why is this so hard to grasp? I find myself on a semi-regular basis questioning whether I am good enough to be someone's companion and if so, am I worth it for that person to stick around. Today I am making a draw on faith and am calling forth those things that are not as though they are. I declare a confidence in myself that I am worth it. I am worthy of love. I speak to fear and declare that YOU have no place in me. I am laying aside jealousy and picking up the word Yahweh spoke. It is finished.
Saturday, July 3, 2010
I'm visiting my family in Chicago, Illinois. Well, Des Plaines, Illinois to be exact. The whole slew of yelling Italians are typical to their heritage: Catholic heathens. As far as a relationship with our Father, well it only comes through a priest on Sundays. I'm sure you're wondering where this is going. Let me cut to the chase. I, on a regular basis, have an intimate relationship with Yahweh and was worried about being away from my regular environment. Going back a touch, I went to Texas over Christmas last year to visit my stepdad's parents, my grandparents. They are extremely involved with church and are also very religious. This environment was awful! I had to constantly fight off spirits and mindsets through the entirety of our stay. Now progressing to the present, this environment is so easy to be in. These people have no relationship with Yahweh and in essence have no desire to. I have not felt threatened or attacked by the enemy the entire time I've been here. I feel like I'm talking in circles. My point is this: where we should feel safer with fellow believers, often times we feel worse! This may be old new to you but to me, this is new revelation. In closing, this should be a point of intercession continually.